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Writer's pictureDiana Vrasmussen
Jan 30, 20193 min read

It’s the way that you make me laugh when I don’t even want to smile.



If you really want to know whether you love a person or not just ask yourself. "Do I love him/her?"

If your answer is «I think I do» most likely it is not love at all. It might be a convenience, fear to be alone, habit, even laziness to find someone else. It’s our brain that THINKS. And if you have to find 100 reasons why you «LOVE» a person, it will definitely do the job. A brain is up for it, up for a challenge.


But the truth is - Love is a feeling, so you don’t «think» love you FEEL love.

And sometimes love is challenging, inconvenient, stupid, irrational, comes in a wrong time and on the wrong conditions, painful, hard, but it’s always so beautiful, so desirable, so rare, so passionate, so inexplicable, so long-awaited or maybe very sudden...


You are automatically happy when you are in love, and you are the absolute best version of yourself at all times. So how can we feel love and be happy? Very easy, why don’t we all just start with ourselves?


I fly a lot, and I am one of those rare passengers who actually pays attention to the safety instructions. Flight attendants always say something like “In case of a loss of cabin pressure, oxygen masks above your seat will deploy, please place the mask first and then assist your child or other passengers.”

The idea here is if you fail to help yourself first, you definitely won’t be able to help or even save your child or a person next to you. And I genuinely believe we all can implement this instruction in our lives.

When you love yourself, when you care a lot about your persona, when you feel happy for one simple reason because you are you, when you feel comfortable with yourself, can you imagine how beneficial it is for the others?


Only the person who genuinely loves himself can share this very love with his partner and can comprehend what love actually is.


Most of us were taught that self-love equals selfishness, and it's not good to be selfish or self-observed, again as we were taught. But is it really so? Like everything in life, it's all about quantity and balance.

The only difference between the poison and the remedy is the dosage.


When we think of selfishness we imagine the absolute: a person who only values himself, his life, his desires, his plans, has zero respect for others, puts his interests first and can do anything to get what he wants, that would be extreme, wouldn't it? But if we balance this picture out a little bit, if the person is moderately selfish, he loves, respects, cares, values himself. He knows exactly how people can and can not treat him. He knows his own worth. How does it look, much better isn't it? If only we all were brought up with the understanding of self-worth.

And I can understand that it's easier said than done kind of situation. Most of us have baggage: childhood trauma, low self-esteem, unfortunate events, lousy parenting, painful experiences, sad memories, bullying, and God knows what else.

If only we could all understand that we are more powerful and we are more in control that we can possibly comprehend. We are grown up people, and it's time to take responsibilities in the present to create a better future for ourselves. Starting today, with few baby steps, show yourself some love, show respect you deserve and in no time your tomorrow will be better than your yesterday.


When you are a happy muffin, you will attract similar to your mindset people. Be love to attract love, be kind to attract kindness, be a beauty to attract beauty.


I really do believe that love is the key to happy you and your happy relationship. Love opens you up, you think and analyze less, but feel and experience so much more. Start with yourself: love, cherish, spoil, be devoted to yourself and when the time comes, and you meet your "one and only" you both will have so much to offer, to give and to share.



Spread THE LOVE!

xx

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